I was of late thinking of the various kinds of people I have come across in my 4-5 years of work experience. Although there have been a number of articles and books written on the subject, I thought I would casually jot down some of the categories I could think of. It is not necessary as all psychological studies say, that one fits into only one category. I, of course, am one who could be thought of as a category, or rather a mixture of categories, in myself. Therefore, it is not a comment/study on others alone, it is about a lot of people I have met and interacted with, including myself. There definitely are the good ones, who I do not think I can characterize in a paragraph. So I’ve spared them. Anyway, they are good as it is, so why bother them?

1. I’m the Best
Everyone would of course have come across some people who revel in their notion that they are simply the best. No one or nothing comes anywhere close to them, whether it be with respect to talent, knowledge, performance level, communication skills and what not. Especially, if such people happen to have some exposure or worldly knowledge which came with experience, you can be assured that they misuse that exposure to give credibility to whatever they say or do. At the end of the day, for them it’s all about “I am superior to you in the exposure I have had, so without question, I am right whatever I say/do”. Humility is never their best quality. And if you happen to have a conflicting idea than theirs, you are dead unless you have immense patience to listen to a mad person struggling to prove him/herself right, even sometimes when they know they are wrong. They just need to have the last word. Sometimes with such people, you have that urge to scream “You are not the only one who can have an opinion!!”. Sadly, because of circumstances, we satisfy ourselves by screaming it out in our head.

2. I can make fun of anyone.. Ohhh I’m so funny
Humour is an essential quality for every human being. Without humour, you are dull and drab. But the sense of humour of some is really too much to handle. They go around pulling anyone and everyone’s leg. There is no question of not liking the joke. Worse yet, there is no question of the other getting hurt. “Whether my joke was offensive or not, you ARE SUPPOSED TO like it and laugh at it”. Try telling these people that they went a little overboard with their joke – you would see the dark side where they become all defensive and get offended about the fact that you did not take their joke as a joke. Going further, try making fun of such people. You would see their face change colour, the desperate effort to not be the butt of the joke and a futile try at retaliation.

3. Been there, done it all
There are some who have seen and done everything. Unlike the first category, they might not always try to prove that they are the best. But they have a very strong desire to tell people that there is nothing that they do not know. If you talk about literature, there is not a single book they have not read. If you talk about sports, there is not a single sport which they do not follow. If you talk about a disease you have, they would invariably have suffered from the same disease. To the extent that, to quote a colleague of mine, try going and telling them you just committed a murder. You can be sure that they would reply “Oh yeahhhhh.. In my previous organization I have also committed a murder!!”. 😛 Some of them even graduate to the level of “I can do it all”. These are the ones who jump around with over-enthusiasm about everything, act hyperactive, take on anything that comes their way and end up doing nothing.

4. Everyone! Look at me!!
The ever-so-common – attention seekers. Who would not have seen them! They are loud, they are flashy and mannn.. they are annoying. It becomes especially annoying when you are talking to someone and they keep calling your name from behind, repeatedly as if your conversation with the other is certainly not important. They will not back off until you turn back and acknowledge them. Anything and everything that they do is with the sole intention of making sure that everyone around has noticed them – whether it be for the right reasons or the wrong ones, they just don’t care. Sitting in the middle of a crowded cafeteria, you would see these people laugh out unnecessarily loud and clap at the silliest and most pathetic of joke that you cracked. Sometimes, you would wonder whether your joke was that hilarious. No my friend, it has got nothing to do with your joke. It was just another reason for them to show off their supposedly jovial nature.

5. The Beeeeest Friend
These are the ones who want to be everyone’s best friend. There is no one they do not love or care for. And most often, you are left clueless as to why this person keeps calling him/herself your friend, when you met the person just the other day. They go to the extent of declaring to the world how special you are and how close a bond he/she has with you. They have an excellent gift of knowing how to ignore the deliberate hints that you give to tell them you do not want to be close. Nononono.. whether you want it or not, you ARE my beeeest friend. :-/

6. The mother-figure
They have the calling to take care of everyone around them. It is almost as if they are the self-proclaimed “Universal Mom”. They will not let you go until you understand that you are imbecile to even think that you can take care of yourself. “Even if you are 10 years elder to me, you are still my baby”. They will ensure that they bring food for you, snatch away your plate once you are done and put it in the bin themselves, keep checking on you every two minutes whether you are doing fine as if you will not survive more than two minutes without their surveillance, scolds you for not taking care of your health and the list just goes on and on and on… They will make sure that by spending time with you they take you to a point where the thought of even your own Mom starts getting on your nerves.

7. The Thanks a lot and I’m so sorry kind
Then there is the all-grateful and all-apologetic people. Even by moving a paper for them, you have given them the greatest treasure of their life. They would keep thanking you, that too in front of everyone, to the point where you feel outright embarrassed and start cursing yourself for ever thinking of helping anyone in your life. They could go to the other end as well where the number of “Sorry” you get for something as simple as dropping a fork makes you want to run for your life. I mean, it is not my baby you dropped, it is just a goddamn fork!! :@

8. Aww!! My life has been a tragedy! :(
There are some people who are very close to the fourth category of attention-seekers. However, they vary by the modus operandi. If the other kind is loud, these are subdued and gloomy – rather, they try to look so. If you pass by without asking them why they look gloomy, they would ensure that they come to you with something of absolutely no relevance, just so that you listen to the melancholic tone of their voice. No matter how much you try to escape the torture they will somehow or the other get to their sob-stories of how they have been victimized, tortured and abandoned – sometimes you will even see that they start off out of the blue. It takes them less than two minutes to change a holiday-like conversation to a funeral-like conversation. It will be a never-ending story of course and the only way out is to pretend that you are late for a meeting or you are getting an important call. What shocks me is the fact that there are a lot of people who fall for this trick and start empathizing with them. Phew!

9. The Mood-Swingers
They are unpredictable like the monsoons. One day you would see them in high spirits, all happy and jovial. You have a great time with them. And you make the mistake of thinking of them as normally jovial people. The next day in the middle of a crowd you wave to them saying “Hey there!” with a broad smile on your face and you would see that they pass by as if you were non-existent. That moment of embarrassment where everyone stares at you as if you have gone crazy, will teach you the bitter lesson of life that you should not always try to initiate a conversation. 😀

10. All talk, no action
These are the people who have a lot to say about everything. They get irritated, emotional and angry about the wrong that happens around them. They can give elaborate speeches about how the situation needs to change and what should be done to change the situation. Try asking them to come with you to the boss to talk about it; you will see them disappear in the fraction of a second. Something or the other would keep them busy until they are absolutely sure that you have forgotten the issue.

11. The nod-alongs
They are simple people. They just nod. Yeah. That’s all that they do. Or probably smile at times when they nod. No words – mute, especially when it comes to issues persisting around you. You cannot call them diplomatic as such. They just ensure that they do not get into any trouble for having opened their mouth. Do not expect them to be friends or foes – they are just some people who you work with, nothing more or less.

12. The rebellious souls
The ones who believe that the system needs to be flawless, that everything should be fair, that everything is either black or white. They ensure that even the slightest of mistakes in the system that comes to their notice do not go unnoticed by others. They would go to any extent or level to ensure that justice is brought about. In the process, they can be blunt and rude. As I said, they do not have a grey area. And mostly, they do not care what others think about them, which means that if they do not like something or someone, you can definitely read it on their face. For them it is all about right and wrong. Try asking these people to let go of some petty issue – you would see them feel betrayed. For all the justice that they try to bring, even for others, they end up being isolated by even the very same people they try to help.

So.. Are you one of these??? 😛